Is Cooking a Love Language?

In my humble opinion creating the mood for a dinner party is equally important as the food itself.  I’m guessing a few professional chefs might challenge my thinking on this, and that’s ok-.  To me it’s about creating a space to honor & celebrate the food that was prepared and the people who will enjoy it.  

I’ve always worked on the premise that a thoughtful and well executed meal deserves a thoughtful & intentional space to be enjoyed.  Trust me when I say I have no objection to a quick meal on a paper plate from time to time, but a beautifully cooked mushroom & asparagus risotto slapped onto a paper plate hurts my heart just a little. 

For me the process of cooking & serving a meal for my dear ones is an act of love, is cooking an actual love language?   I do love the process!  I’m the girl who loves the day my Cooks Illustrated magazine arrives in the mail, I make myself a cup of coffee and read it cover to cover.  Reading about the food, preparation & technique inspires me to cook a new recipe and I find it super exciting to learn new way to approach cooking a familiar dish.  All I want to do for the next several days is cook!  My husband sorta loves the day the CI arrives in the mail.  He especially loves when a new season of The Great British Baking Show comes out……the same thing happens.

When I invite friends over for dinner, I spend time thinking about the people who I will be serving, I think about what they enjoy eating, do they have any food restrictions, what day of the week is the dinner party?  Is the next day a weekend?  This is a consideration, will we have a long, slow evening to enjoy a multi course meal & a glass or two of delicious wine, or is this a work night and we need a family style lighter meal? I pour over my cook books, find a main dish that sounds great, figure out the supporting dishes, how those foods fit together on the plate.  Is there a variety of color? Do the sizes work together? Is the meal balanced with protein & veggies? Is the main saucy, how will that play with the other foods on the plate? What will be best as an after-dinner treat? If the main is heavy, a fruity dessert is perfect.   

I then turn my attention to the space where we will share the meal, in my home it’s usually the dinning room or our backyard dinning table.  In the winter months I love to drag a table into the living room and serve dinner by the fire, so romantic & cozy!

I consider how many people will be around the table, will everyone be comfortable?  I don’t have a problem with a full table, its cozy and fun- I just will be thoughtful about how I set the table, using a table cloth vs. placemats so that the place settings can be more flexible.  I want my left-handed friend to sit at the end of the table so he has space to move freely.  Will the food be plated in the kitchen by me and served? In that case no restrictions on the table scape, except the height of the décor- I want to be sure my guests can see each other’s face across the table. Will it be family style on the table? Be thoughtful of the candles and how they are placed by the platters, will someone get burned when reaching to serve themselves?  Salad & main plate? With a multi course meal the answer is yes, more causal family style, one large plate is perfectly fine. Salt & pepper at multiple locations on the table. I always, always use cloth napkins, even with a paper plate dinner of pizza, cloth napkins are non-negotiable around my table.  Unscented candles only- nothing can ruin a meal quicker than a scented candle.  I love to use flowers & greenery on the table, I will use the least scented flowers I can find.  Just a few snips of beautiful greenery can go a long way to creating a table that looks & feels special. 

My favorite go to table scape is this: bare wood table, rattan oval placemats, white dishes, clear mis matched wine & water glasses, clear glass votives, clear glass pint sized milk bottles with white flowers and a colorful cloth napkin. 

Cooking & caring for my people is one of my greatest joys, to me any day we share is a day worthy of celebration! A multi course dinner or a yummy pizza out of the box on a paper plate ( with a cloth napkin 😊) or anything in between- it’s all about the beautiful souls sitting down together around a table, sharing a meal, lively conversation & laughs, this is my happy place.